People who feel understood in a conflict come out of it less damaged, even when nothing gets solved. Saying it back proves you listened, and it slows you down before you say the line you'll regret. Evidence: decent
You don't have to agree. You have to get it right. If you got it wrong, they'll tell you, and that's useful too.
Same theme: When it turns into a fight
When it turns into a fight
Argue their side for a minute
When someone's got you angry, spend one minute making their case as if you meant it.
1 minEvidence: decent
When it turns into a fight
Ask what they saw, not what they meant
When you hear "you always do this" or "your work's been sloppy", ask for the last time it happened and what they saw. Then answer that, not the "always".
no timeEvidence: worth trying
When it turns into a fight
Book the money talk, don't spring it
Don't raise money the moment a bill lands or a purchase shows up. Say "Can we go through money on Sunday, half an hour?" Then keep to it.
30 minEvidence: worth trying