steady

Stress and nerves · Money

Say the number to one person

Tell one person you trust the actual figure you owe or are short by. Not "things are tight". The number.

5 minEvidence: worth trying

No study behind this one. Evidence: worth trying

My bet: a number nobody else knows gets bigger in your head than it is on paper. Once you've said it out loud, it's back to being a number.

Pick someone who won't lecture you and won't reach for their wallet on the spot. A partner, a brother, the friend who's been short himself. You're not asking for anything. You're just not carrying it alone.

If the number is past what you can handle, the second person to tell is a free, independent debt adviser. Not one that charges you, and not one selling you a loan.

The wider case for having one person in the loop is in Fighting your battles alone.

Same theme: Money

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