How to do it
- Look for one today. Someone helping a stranger, covering for a colleague who's struggling, handing back what wasn't theirs.
- Don't look past it. Watch it through.
- Act on the pull the same day. A message, a door held, the job nobody asked you to do.
- Keep it small. The studies measured the urge, not a heroic follow-up.
How the pull passes on
- Witnessingsomeone acting well
Seeing moral excellence, someone doing right by another person, was the trigger in the studies.
- Elevationthe feeling it gives
The name psychologists use for what you feel watching it. Measured by what people said they felt.
- The pullto help, to connect
People reported wanting to do good for others and to be closer to them. A few hundred US students, self-report.
- Youact on it today
Looking for it on purpose, and acting on the pull the same day, is my addition. That step is a guess.
Why it works
Watching someone act well towards another person does something to you. Psychologists call the feeling elevation. People who witnessed moral excellence, someone doing right by someone else, reported wanting to help others and to be closer to them. Evidence: decent Seeing someone's skill, admiration, pulled people towards improving themselves instead, and being helped, gratitude, towards the helper. Evidence: decent The four studies used a few hundred US students, and the measures were self-report. Evidence: decent
If your read of people has gone sour, this is a small counterweight you can go looking for. Looking for it on purpose, and acting on the pull, is my addition. Evidence: worth trying
The long readEvery step of the chain, each study with its numbers, and what's still unproven. 2 min read.
What happens in your brain
This chain is behaviour, not brain areas. Nobody has scanned it. The first three stops come from one paper; the last is mine.
You see someone act well. The trigger was witnessing moral excellence: someone doing right by another person. Evidence: decent
Elevation is the feeling. That's the name for it. It was measured by what people said they felt. Evidence: decent
The pull is to help and to connect. People reported wanting to do good for others and to be closer to them. Evidence: decent
You act on it today. Doing something with the pull the same day hasn't been tested. Evidence: worth trying
The proof
- Algoe and Haidt, 2009: in four studies using recalled moments, videos and a diary of real events, people who witnessed moral excellence reported more motivation to do good for others and to be close to others. Admiration went with wanting to improve yourself; gratitude with wanting to repay the helper. Evidence: decent
- The samples were a few hundred students at two US universities, and the measures were self-report: what people said they felt and wanted, not what they did next. Evidence: decent
How to do it
- Look for one today: someone helping a stranger, covering for a colleague who's struggling, handing back what wasn't theirs.
- Don't look past it. Watch it through.
- Act on the pull the same day. A message, a door held, the job nobody asked you to do. Send the message is an easy one.
- Keep it small.
Watch out
The studies used a few hundred US students and measured what people said they felt and wanted to do, not what they then did. Evidence: decent Looking for the feeling on purpose, and acting on it, hasn't been tested. Evidence: worth trying
Watching someone else be decent isn't the same as being decent. The second step is the point.