steady

Friends · Making new ones

Book the next one before you leave

With someone you'd like as a friend, suggest the next meeting before this one ends. Keep suggesting until they start doing it too.

1 minEvidence: decent

One paper asked adults who had recently moved, and first-year students, how much time they'd spent with people who became friends. Roughly: dozens of hours to go from acquaintance to casual friend, and a lot more than that to become close. The hours that counted were time spent hanging out, not time working together. Evidence: decent

Take this loosely. It's one paper, people estimating their own hours after the fact, and volunteers rather than a cross-section of the population. The shape is what to keep: a friend is dozens of hours, not one good evening. Evidence: decent

My reading, not the data: most new friendships stall because neither side suggests the second meeting. Evidence: worth trying Be the side that does. The other person probably liked you more than you think.

Source: Hall, 2019, Journal of Social and Personal Relationships (link)

Same theme: Making new ones

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